The synchronicity of the defiance of gravity

Synchronicity is generally undefinable as a phenomenon, as is the defiance of gravity. Carl Jung discusses the whole concept of two unrelated events in one of those books I read all those years ago. Some feel that they are capable of defying gravity, and eventually they fall to the ground, victim of their own arrogance, and that's how I'm feeling right now.

I've had another epiphany, a rather tearful one at that. We come to points in our life when we realize that we should have trusted our first instinct and run. That's where I am now.

At the outset, the lawyer told me that he got bored with people, and that's what happened with me. I'll probably never know the how or why behind it, but that's my theory, and I'm sticking to it. How I came to that conclusion really isn't important, but the gist of the story involves an argument, and some very helpful chats with some friends and acquaintances.

Am I sad that he's out of my life? Yes. For a brief, shining moment, I felt like he was the one that I was to grow gracefully old with. He was to be the great partner, and the great love of my life, but in retrospect, it was all illusion. I now have reason to doubt the veracity of some of his comments, and I've gained a bit of insight as to how he functions as a person.

Do I believe that he genuinely cares for me? That's hard to say right now. He was downright unkind to me today, when there wasn't cause to be that way in my opinion. For that, I'm a tad bitter. The reason was one of paranoia, and it was unfounded, as I explained to him. Whether he heard that or not remains to be seen. People that know me well realize that I rarely hold grudges, and I certainly am not going to retain this ill feeling toward him for such a minor infraction as this.

Ultimately, it boils down to this: lesson learned. Notes taken.

That said, on to the next chapter in my life, and the next stop on the "Rob World Tour." I'll probably say more about my thoughts later because of the depth of my feelings for that brat. Until then, I'll cut the melodrama and work on making myself a better person, and being a better friend to those who genuinely care for me. I feel as though I've failed some people in that respect, and that also makes me a bit sad.

So back to defying gravity. We always want the stuff that is bad for us. Cigarettes and chocolate milk. While the idea is pretty, the reality is that gravity ALWAYS wins. We are mortal; we live, love, pay taxes and die. Yes, the view is pretty from the air--I ought to know. Eventually, we are brought back down to earth, and we are reminded that as mortals, we cannot defy gravity for long. Our health will suffer and the ride will come to an end.

By the same token, there are momentary lapses when we soar high. We feel free and unencumbered. We love not only our self but those around us. It's these momentary bits of happiness that keep life bearable and allow us to get through the times when life aint so grand. I think the trick is to somehow bridge the mountain high, valley low.

Once again, I quote my secret hero:

Only if you have been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain.

~RN